OMG...Just..........No........WTF

This is our youth...our future...being corrupted and over-sexualized. I was listening to a local radio station (Q100 Atlanta) which plays a nice mix of top 40 music but has a great morning show where the crew tackles hot-button topics and issues every morning. This morning...they featured a video... it is below....

Fair warning- the video is LOUD and starts immediately upon opening the page (the "Read More" tab) so...turn your sound down!!!!





Is anyone else disturbed?

Surprisingly enough... while I was disturbed by the video itself and the consequences of such actions... I was also concerned (not surprised of course) about the calls that came in concerning it. "In places like Jamaica and Africa...this is common" was a comment from a listener. This video is clearly taken in a Spanish Speaking country (you could even hear that over the radio as they played it...) but, of course, it goes back to hypersexual black people...

Its not about RACE people - its about KIDS being sexualized at such young ages... get your minds right...


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Intolerance at its Finest....

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Drake Gay?

Real post coming shortly but....thought I'd drop this little diddy to wake ya up. You guys seem to have a love/hate relationship with this guy here. More fuel to the fire!

Thanks Bossip (obviously...covering half the damn pic up) for the heads up!






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*Highlights* Lady Gaga's Penis

I have to say... I have bought into all of the hype. I think her songs are catchy (isn't that all it takes these days?) though I wouldnt venture too far to say that this girl is an amazing singer. Nice beats...silly songs...over-the-top videos....lesbian hype...

Then...there's the crazy outfits....





The internet is abuzz with the supposed leaking of parts of an interview in which she mentions actually being a hermaphrodite (no source is ever given and no article has come out yet...you be the judge).

"It's not something that I'm ashamed of, just isn't something that I go around telling everyone. Yes. I have both male and female genitalia, but I consider myself a female. It's just a little bit of a penis and really doesn't interfere much with my life."

Is this all a ploy to sell more records? Rumors have been swirling for months that she is a transsexual (man hands...Adam's apple...) so is this just our minds playing trick on us? Or did she do this on purpose to keep us guessing? I mean...its clear she likes the attention and the mystery of "GaGa".

Thoughts?

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Sinnin or Winnin?

Officially putting myself back on the market as of today.

I’m tired of being single! It was fun while it lasted, but I was lying to myself!! I told myself… Southern…you like being single. You like having “options” and being able to just do "whatever" whenever. The problem was…I didn’t do “whatever” because I didn’t feel comfortable doing that while not in a relationship. Isnt that something?

Vegas was a real eye opener. Firstly, as I always do, I told myself I was going to have a great time. You’re going to meet some hot (and nice) guy and hang out, make a real connection, and maybe hook up. Now…here’s the real me. I don’t hook up with random guys- I’ve got too many body concerns and I’m afraid of STD’s. I don’t trust anyone with my life. Even when I’m BLACKOUT drunk…I still have the common sense not to go wandering off with some random guy.

Well…as I stated before…Vegas was an eye opener. I had told myself that I wouldn’t risk my life for the sake of fun and that, as long as I was cautious with who I spent my time with, I’d be fine. I’d have my brothers and a friend nearby so I’d definitely always be safe. The very first night…I ended up in a club by myself lol. I was ditched…probably for strippers or something like that... Worst part? I didn’t care! I wanted to be alone- maybe meet a guy- maybe go back to his room. ITS FUCKIN VEGAS! So here I am at the bar buying myself a shot when a guy comes up and pays for it for me. Cool…I’m thinking….this is a good start. I wander around the club dancing with this guy for a bit and then, of course, I have to pee. It takes me about 30 minutes to even GET TO the bathroom and then I wait in line for like 20 and when I finally come out…I can’t find that guy. Its way too crowded to try and wander around looking for him so I again just get on the dance floor and dance. I’m pleasantly tipsy by this point and I just don’t give a damn. I headed to the bar again on a lame song and decide to get a mixed drink instead of a shot. Another guy buys it and as we drink, we get to talking. Enjoying our convo (can’t tell you for the life of me what it was about now…lol) we head to the back of the club where there are booths to sit in. It was slightly awkward because his friends would appear every so often and gesture and make those goofy “OOOO You’re going to get some” faces and noises that they think girls are too stupid to know about. I’m tired so I tell him that I’m ready to go. As we near Harrah’s (where I stayed)…he smiles and says that this is also his hotel. Opportunity? Is that you? I opt out of doing anything this night…though I did insinuate that maaaaaaybe something could happen. We make a lunch and dinner date for the next day and I go to my room. Night 1 was fun!

I guess I’ll spoil it for you guys- I DID NOT HAVE SEX WITH THIS GUY!!! Lol! I could have…but I didn’t want to. I just didn’t feel right about it. The next day was the same guy, same situation. Out drinking and dancing...blah blah blah. He was really drunk and I had been picking on him all night so, as we were leaving, I said I’ll walk you back to your room to make sure YOU make it home tonight. That is so OBVIOUS but I thought I’d gauge his reaction. This is as close as I had come to wanting to hook up in years so…why not? Um…HELL NO! We grabbed some food and headed to his room. By the time we got there… PUKING. This guy was SICK! We walked in the door and he started puking all over the place. I went into… “mother” mode or something. Took off his clothes…dragged him to the toilet…patted him on the back and got him water while he puked. When it finally slowed down…I flopped him in his bed on his side (so he wouldn’t choke) and I sat there waiting for his friends to come back. I waited for about an hour…then…realizing that they’d see him on his bed half naked and assume stuff…I left! Ruined it for me. I probably might have done something with this guy. Needless to say…we didn’t hang out the next day or anything like that. I know…its not his fault…but I saw him half naked (didn’t want him to puke on his clothes) with upchuck all over him. Not a good vision.

The next day I went clubbing sans brothers and decided to get fucked up and find a new guy to chit chat with and have fun! I spent the night dancing with some random guy the entire night. We kept running to the bar and buying shots or drinks and got sooooo messed up that we couldn’t find the beat if we wanted to. THAT was fun. There was no one else there but me and him. Realizing that I might do something bad though…I parted ways and headed home. ANTICLIMATIC? I know!!! I’m so dumb sometimes!

Anyway…I’m gonna snag a man here in Atlanta. I’m tired of being single! Updates on that soon!
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Not Quite the 40 y.o. Virgin

Cut to the chase - I'm still a virgin. Guess what? I don't have a problem with that or any intention of losing my virginity anytime soon.

Let's first clarify one thing - I, like you, am a sexual entity. I too get "urges" and ...really horny at random times, but I've drawn two conclusions:

1. I have a lower libido than most
2. I have a ridiculous amount of self-control (I know this is true...just curious about the 1st conclusion)

At 20+ years of age, I still haven't had ANY sexual experiences with another. I've had my fair share of offers and VERY close calls, but in all situations my mind proved stronger than my body, and I pushed the breaks hard and fast. I'm just a different kind of guy, and I embrace this.

I've always been more attracted to one's psyche than physicality. Sure, I can get turned on by a really hot person, but I am MOST attracted when I am intrigued by and enamored with someone's personality and character. A genuinely good/deep/fun person has more power over me than the hottest chick in the universe. I put little value in the physical because, as we all know, it WILL CHANGE over time and is ONLY SKIN DEEP. Think about standing outside a beautifully landscaped/constructed house and stepping inside to find lopsided rooms, leaky pipes, mildew on the walls, and corroded floors. Now consider a humble looking home that within contains the most lavish, eclectic, charming layout and mix of items (oh, and the windows are numerous and crystal clear). I don't know about you, but I'm choosing the house with the humble exterior.

In fact, all remotely intelligent home buyers check out the interior of a house before making any major investment. I (will) take the same approach in making decisions about sex.

Sex is a MAJOR INVESTMENT to me. There are emotional connections formed that never break. There are also insane risks including pregnancy, STI's, and AIDS. Combine that with my Christian upbringing and innate understanding of morality and you may grasp why I'm still a virgin.

When I do have sex, I want it to be with someone I trust, admire, feel a physical attraction towards, and respect. Call me picky, but one's physical alone just isn't great enough to make me take the risk.

I've survived thus far without having sex and, as I haven't tasted of "that fruit" yet, I honestly feel I could live my entire life contently without it. Believe it or Not, Ripley, but it's my truth. What's yours?

Read these lyrics from India Arie's song, "Part of my life:"

Oh it's easy to find someone to play with
and almost anyone will do to fill your idle time
but that very special someone
you can share all your dreams with is so hard to find

And it used to be like me to settle for the physical
but these days it ain't too easy to make up my mind
cause apparently your body is just too temporary to take up my precious time

See I've got to know that
that I can be free with you and
you've got to show that
that you're worthy of my time
can you stimulate my mind?

And I know that it looks good,
but can you be a part of my life
and I'm sure that it feels good
but can you be a part of my life
and it probably even tastes good
but can you be a part of my life
I've got to know


Be Well, Read more...

Almost a Woman

15 (almost 16)


That's when I lost it. When I was younger…I was pretty hard on myself. I figured I’d never get married or be in love…who could love me? I felt ugly, too skinny (definitely not a problem now!), and just overall…I didn’t see much potential in myself. Thus…I didn’t value myself and my gifts; my virginity was not something I held in high accord nor cared about.

In fact, when I moved to Georgia, I thought even less of it. My middle school was a hotbed for horny kids. Once…in my science class (by far the horniest class I had) these two kids ran to the back before the teacher was in class. We had 5 rows of normal desks and then in the back back of the classroom, there were the taller lab desks (5 rows again). These two kids had SEX back there without the teacher realizing. Kids were always getting caught in bathrooms and closets…just disgusting. Well…I remember stating matter-of-factly to some friends that I had not ever had sex or done anything. The next day…guys that I had NEVER spoken to were in my face flirting/asking me to be their girlfriend. I liked the attention at first…until I realized why. Rumors of my virginity up for grabs… It got to the point of harassment. This one guy would try to rub up my legs in my EIGHTH GRADE science class. It made me so uncomfortable. No matter how many times I said stop or slapped his hands…there they were trying to creep up my thighs. Yuck. I started to hate being a virgin…it was like a scarlet letter. Here I am…pure and innocent…and I’M the outsider…what the hell?!

So two years later...I’m back in North Carolina (living with dad again) and have been dating this guy for awhile. I didn’t like him…at all really…he was just the best friend of my best friends’ boyfriend. Convenience. They were older than us…so we had rides and access to alcohol (beer’s nasty…lol) so we kept them around. Plus...how cool is it to brag about having a boyfriend that's not in high school when you're 15 (now that I look back...ew...)? He started pressuring me shortly into the relationship. Ugh I thought…here we go again. I have to admit…I was curious about sex. I had not discovered masturbating yet (though it would have saved me a lot of trouble…). I had not watched porn yet. So I definitely wanted to see what was up- what all those kids in Georgia were so hyped about. After a year of him bugging me I literally said fuck it and gave it up. It was TERRIBLE lol. I watched t.v. during it. He was just…lame. I’m not sure he really took my virginity at all but, whatever. And YES we used protection.

Though it was a dumb and stupid reason to lose it…I don’t regret losing it at that time or anything like that. I didn’t cry or mark the day in my diary. I didn’t throw a parade. It didn’t (and still doesn’t) mean anything to me. I’m still skeptical about being in love (its more pain than its worth) and I still don’t value the little things (1 month anniversary…place we met etc etc). I’m just not that kind of girl. If I could do it all over again…would I do it the same? Nah…there was this much better guy later on down the road.



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V Card - Intact...Enough

You can still make out my name on it. Cool.

What IS it with guys and obsessing over a girl's virginity? It's not even that special to ME. I don't fantasize about the first time with the man I love. I don't guard it with my life. I definitely don't think it's something SPECIAL you give away. It's not a GIFT. For those that think it's a gift?! Sorry, but no. A bloodied dick is not a gift.

I asked someone once "Why do guys keep asking me if I'm a virgin?" His answer was "Some virgins are just aloof." I think he meant aloof about the sex thing. In other words, I'm not THIRSTY. I'm not FIENDING to F. Don't get me wrong. I have my moments when I'm like OOO Shiet I wanna have some FUN. But I'm never starved or hungry for some meat.

What does my virginity mean to guys? Some might think of me as fresh meat. Some might think it's a conquest to take it from me (again, take what? smh). Some might just keep it moving because where's the fun in having sex with someone that's inexperienced? Some might not even care but the thought crossed their minds so they asked. (There goes that damn virgin vibe.) I'm sure there is a plethora of reactions and reasons to why they ask about it.
Fellas, let me know what a girl's virginity means to you and why you want to know.

Yea. 23. Virgin. Honestly. It doesn't matter to me. I'm sure sex is great. No, I'm not waiting until I get married. I already said I'm not looking for someone special to give my virginity to. It is what it is.

Three things that cross my mind when I think about sex:
1. STDs. I already told y'a how those things GROSS me the F out..and I'm not gonna catch a case of the babydaddy drama
2. A good friend of mine said "Think about who you lose it to. You only lose it once." I mean, yea. I don't particularly care about losing it. But I do care about who I have sex with.
3. I'm loyal to someone. Are we an item? No. I don't even know where we're at right now. But that's just the person I am. I am loyal to my friends and emotionally invested in them. My heart is in 100%. So no, I'm not finna go club and bang. None of that putting emotions on hold and then doing the "BONG! bop" (hop on, hop off) and going back to being me in the daytime.

It's not like I'm ugly. I got boobs. I got a booty. It's not like I've never been approached about sex. But I don't do sex hook-ups. Especially not one-night stands. DEFINITELY not with someone who is already in a relationship. I don't play games. Too many guys just wanna play grown games and then act like a damn baby about it when I don't wanna play with them. I don't like that. Man up. Holla when you got your head right about who I am. I'm no ho. Don't treat me like one. Don't spit ya wack game and expect me to be impressed. BE REAL. That's wassup. Unfortuantely, that's rare. So my challenge to you men out there, be different.

I've done some stuff. But you know what? It's not satisfying when at the end of the night, it amounts to nothing. I get attached. So hookin' up. Not my thing. But I live and learn and move on. It's not a big deal. Broken heart. It's a fact of life. I lived through it and I'm a stronger person for it. No experience is without merit if you make it worthwhile to have gone through it.

I've made my choices. This is me. 23. Virgin. Nice to meet you.
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Scratch and Sniff

Trends via TrendHunter.com.

We talked about sex!



Now let's talk about the side effects... STI's:

First...some OH SO SEXY stats (taken from the American Social Health Association )

-More than half of all people will have an STD/STI at some point in their lifetime.

-The estimated total number of people living in the US with a viral STD/STI is over 65 million. Every year, there are at least 19 million new cases of STDs/STIs, some of which are curable.

-Each year, one in four teens contracts an STD/STI.

-One in two sexually active persons will contact an STD/STI by age 25.

-It is estimated that as many as one in five Americans have genital herpes, a lifelong (but manageable) infection, yet up to 90 percent of those with herpes are unaware they have it.

-With more than 50 million adults in the US with genital herpes and up to 1.6 million new infections each year, some estimates suggest that by 2025 up to 40% of all men and half of all women could be infected.

------------------------

WHAT THE HELL?! This is some scary SHIT. 65 Million people have them!!! By 2025 – 40% of the population could have herpes!!! WTF. Seriously people….we need to work on this. Use condoms ALL THE TIME. I don’t care if its your boyfriend of three years…and you trust him. USE A DAMN CONDOM. Get tested every 2 or 3 months! I have heard horror stories of women who get AIDs/Herpes from their husbands (and vica versa…equal opportunity diseases) and can’t understand why. All it takes is for them to cheat once and not tell you…and tada…shiny new gift.

I’m really scared…like …devastatingly scared. I haven’t had sex in YEARS (my friends won't believe it...but its true!) and I don’t plan on it because of all of the fear involved. You can protect yourself only so much. For instance…while researching the statistics above…I came across a board for people who have herpes (I googled Trojan STD Commercials) and they were outraged that some of these commercials stated that simply using a condom can prevent herpes. IT DOESN’T! WHAT THE HELL!? Herpes is transmitted through skin to skin contact. So…unless you’re using a full body condom…there’s a high chance your privates may still touch an infected area. Never having sex again…just gonna buy a vibrator or something…they don’t give you herpes!

Be safe readers...

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Sex Ban in Kenya!

So...in protest of ill relations in their government G-10, a women's activism group in Kenya, has called upon women to boycott sex with their husbands/significant others for a week. Now...to me...this doesn't sound so bad or out of the ordinary. Most older married couples rarely have sex anyway. Plus...it's just a week.

The men in Kenya, however, are freaking out about this! Silly silly men!!! They are upset and disgusted about their wives having the audacity to deny them sex for a week (some even sound like they may use force to get what they want). Is it that hard to abstain or masturbate for 7 days guys? Really? One man has decided to sue the women's group for back aches, lack of sleep and mental anguish! Sex Lawsuit!

5/5 for considering lesbianism and never visiting Kenya (lol)



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Understanding Erotic Life

I got this from my Abnormal Psych textbook (it's an excellent read)
5 Layers of Erotic Life
each layer builds on top of the one before it

Keep in mind that each layer has a large range of norms, too.
My textbook just concentrates on the "abnormal" parts...The cover of the book does not lie
1. Gender Identity- our awareness of being male or female; usually coincides with genitals
gender identity disorder (transsexualism)- dissociation of gender identity and sexual organs; trapped in the wrong gender's body
male-to-female transsexual - a man who feels that he is a woman trapped in a man's body, wants to be rid of his genitals, wants female sexual characteristics, and wants to live as a woman
female-to-male - a woman who feels she is trapped in a man's body, wants to acquire male characteristics, and wants to live as a man
transsexualism is chronic- does not disappear spontaneously
therapy- sex reassignment (sex-change surgery)
2. Sexual Orientation- who do you fall in love with? Our erotic fantasies dictate our sexual orientation
no disorders at this layer
(Orientation...it's like which way are we facing?
Sexual disorders are conditions that grossly impair affectionate sexual relations between two human beings.
Being gay or bisexual does not impair affectionate sexual relations between two human beings)
Basic orientations are homosexual and heterosexual with a continuum of bisexuality in between.
3. Sexual Preference/ Sexual Interest- the types of persons, parts of the body, and situations that are the objects of your sexual fantasies and arousal
paraphilia- sexual interest is so disoriented that it impairs the capacity for affectionate erotic relations between human beings (Greek "love of [philia] what is beyond [para]")
- comprises of an array of unusual objects and situations
3 Categories
A) sexual arousal and preference for nonhuman objects including
fetishes (derive sexual arousal from nonliving objects) and
transvestism/transvestic fetishism (persistently dresses in clothes of opposite gender to achieve sexual arousal)
B) sexual arousal and preference for situations that involve suffering and humiliation including
sadism (deriving sexual arousal by repeatedly and intentionally inflicting pain and humiliation upon others) and
masochism (deriving sexual arousal from engaging in activities that repeatedly and intentionally inflict suffering and humiliation upon themselves)
C) sexual arousal and preference for nonconsenting partners including
exhibitionism (exposing genitals to unwitting and unwilling strangers),
voyeurism (observing the naked body, the disrobing, or the sexual activity of an unsuspecting victim),
telephone scatalogia (recurrent and intense sexual urges to make obscene calls to nonconsenting individuals),
frotteurism (touching and rubbing against a nonconsenting person usually in crowded places),
pedophilia (sexual relations with children below the age of puberty, the age at which we consider it reasonable for a person to be able to give mature consent)
4. Sex Role- public expression of gender identity, what an individual says or does to indicate gender
no defined categories of disorder at this level
...some women are "manly" and some men are "girly" and some conform to societal gender roles
5. Sexual Performance or Functioning- how adequately you perform when you are with a suitable person in a suitable erotic setting; Do desire, arousal, and orgasm occur?
Problems at this level are called sexual "dysfunctions"
sexual response consists of four phases
1. erotic desire
2. physical excitement
3. orgasm
4. resolution
Dysfunction is possible at the first 3 phases. There are also sexual pain disorders (extreme pain associated with intercourse). Dysfunctions can occur in either gender.

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Southern Substance's Stance ...

On Homosexuality.

This is a topic that is very important to me and I am very impassioned about it. I am open to dialogue if you disagree - but these are my views!

As mentioned in a comment that I made to Musecatto's post on the subject- who cares what people do in the privacy of their bedrooms!? And if we are taking a religious slant in judging.. I'm the wrong one. After all this controversy with churches (pastors + little boys) I am disillusioned and have begun to worship and try to find God on my own. That being considered, my view of God and heaven etc is probably very skewed in your minds. I don't forsee two people being in love who just happen to be the same sex as burning in hell. I dont think my God ( the one in my head :) ) would condemn two people in love when He created love itself. I have heard my gay friends speaking about knowing they were gay as early as 3 or 4 and feeling it as natural. Do I sit here every day and say to myself "You are straight..look at that boy over there...yep...he's hot". No... my body does not need coaching - its natural. That's how they relate that they have felt.... Who can condemn nature?

I was not always as open-minded...but upon meeting my gay friends and having many, many talks with them...I realized how ignorant I was. I now defend gay rights like no other and truly believe that they should have the same rights as any other couple, whether that be the right to adopt children freely, health benefits, and marriage, among others.

I go head-to-head with people about this all the time, but perhaps most chilling/revealing to me, is the black population's willingness to condemn people based on physical/emotional attributes when we have suffered so much for the same things. When I hear them use the word "Faggot/Fag" (sorry...) I get upset because I equate those words to "Nigger" (again...sorry). Both groups have lost countless because of those words- how are they any different? When they bring up gays "Flaunting their sin" in gay pride parades or holding hands with their partners, I mention that all PDA should be banned. I'm single so that couple over there holding hands offends me. How about that?

I know a lot of people wont agree with me, but I have to say it: I believe that the struggles of gays are close, if not equivalent, to the struggles of blacks and other minority groups. Have we forgotten that it was not that long ago that blacks could not control who they married and were condemned and/or killed for, say, engaging in relations with a white woman. How far have we come? We are still fighting and, while doing so, we decide to stop to take a detour to tell gays that they don't deserve the rights we fought for 'cuz you know, we were born black and they can just, you know, marry a chick or something. Get out of here...

You can disagree and not condemn people - engage in some conversation. Maybe you'll still feel the same way afterwards or maybe, like me, your minds will change. Read more...

What's Your Position?

This week's topic is in the realm of sexuality with a spotlight on homosexuality.

I didn't really have exposure to homosexuality until high school. Television growing up kind of shied away from this topic. When Ellen came out, it was such a big deal to everyone. I didn't think it was so newsworthy. I still don't think that famous people coming out is really that big of a deal. Or rather, I don't think it should be a big deal to the general public. 1. It's a private matter. 2. Be tolerant, people.

I preach tolerance. I practice acceptance. I'm not saying I'm perfect and practice it to the T or even close to it. But I expect, at the very least, tolerance from myself and others.

One of the many things about sexuality that I find intriguing is gays in the "'hood."

I'm friends with one...I don't want to say "unsavory" character... because believe me, he's VERY savory. YUMmmmMMmmM! 6'6", solidly built, and gorgeous. But, he's had a few run-ins with the law. He is NOT the type to be all over myspace with pictures of guns, stacks of cash, random drug paraphernalia, and naked bitches up the wazoo. Virtual thugs...lol there's a whole OTHER conversation to be had about THAT! hahahaha

My dude, let's call him Enigma, is an atypical man of the "streets." Or at least he doesn't conform to the stereotypical "thug." There are many things about him that surprise me and keep me titillated.

He is very secure about his sexuality. Some people say he's gay because: He dresses well. He takes great care of his hygiene. He isn't afraid to talk to girls about skin care or their man's anatomy. But, he's straight. I'm not sure what these other people consider straight. Is he supposed to be a lice-ridden slob that talks about pussy all day everyday? Please. Put down your webcam and get real.

We've had a few conversations about homosexuality. And while he's not cool with the idea of it (yucky and not at all for him), he is tolerant. He has even come to the defense of a few gay men he knows. In one situation he talked about, he tried to get one of his boys to get a grip on himself because his boy's little brother is gay. His boy had beat up his brother, F'd him up bad enough to land him in the hospital, and threatened to hang him off the roof because he was so disgusted with homosexuality. So Enigma kissed another guy on the lips (no tongue) and asked his boy if he would do all that ish to him. Would he treat Enigma the way he treats his own little brother? No. His boy would not mess with Enigma the way he did with his little brother. The guy probably didn't stop emotionally or physically abusing his brother but at least he hasn't put him in the hospital again.

There was another situation where a male acquaintance of Enigma's was being ridiculed and ostracized for cross-dressing. Enigma didn't like the way his friends were treating this guy and they wouldn't stop being assholes about it so Enigma wore a skirt and went around the neighborhood (read: NOT the village) like that all day. Nobody tried to mess with him. I guess his point was proven because his friends stopped being a dick to the cross-dresser. However, Enigma did stop being so nice to the cross-dresser after the guy made a pass at him. It didn't sit so well with him.

He was extreme to prove a point. But he'll draw the line at actually shagging a man.

So what do you think? What would you do in his situation? How far would you go to prove a point? What are you willing to put on the line in the defense of another person?

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Converting the Homophobe?

Yesterday, I was watching a video on one of my favorite YouTube channels. This particular video concerned a young man’s personal "coming out" story as gay.

While listening, I read a few of the comments and came across a user, “H,” who was unabashedly attacking the gay man in the video and essentially damning the entire gay lifestyle. Having several close gay friends, needless to say, I wasn't too thrilled.  By nature, I usually choose to combat irrational emotions with a rational and tempered breakdown of the issue. Here’s the conversation that transpired:

H:  Deep or not you will still go striaght to hell!

       Repent immediately!

Another User:  Who are WE to judge?

H:  I am a human. I can judge who I feel like judging. And according to the Bible, HOMOsexuals AKA those pitiful GAY folk, will burn in hell. I am talking this straight from the Bible, of course not in the same context but you get my drift. If God wanted you to mate with a MALE he would have made you a FEMALE. Stop denying your GENDER! Go watch female porn, do whatever you have to GET RID OF THESE GAT THOUGHTS! It is not right and you will pay for it in the end. REPENT!

Me:  how can you say "I can judge who I feel like judging"? And then you talk about the Bible. Disagree, but don't judge

H:  What are you talking about? What is there to judge? He's homo, he just admitted it in the damn video!! All I am saying is he IS going to hell if he doesn't repent for his sins. Point blank. Why can't you understand that?

Another User: “H” is way too harsh and should not be mean. i am a Christian and i believe it is a sin to be gay but we should love homosexuals and tell them that their sin needs to be removed from their life. God does not give anyone homosexual desires. it is a trick of the devil.

H:  You are correct. And I do admit to coming off a bit too harsh but you know what, I am just fed up with all this nonsense. It seems as though the gays are taking over! The devil is becoming too common and I don't like it. So if I have to come of a little rude, too bad. It is what it is. You cannot be afraid to tell someone they will go to hell if they don't accept Jesus Christ as their personal Lord an savior. They don't listen because they're in denial and know that I'm right.

Me:  You make sense, but I think the problem is that people seem so obsessed with this "sin" and seem to ignore their own countless sins like lying, fornication, cheating, judging, envying. These sins send people to hell as well, and are MUCH more pervasive. Yet, people seem to focus all their energy and feelings on the one "sin" of homosexuality. How can you expect to "convert people" when they don't feel any support from you? That's the main thing...

---User H then sent Me a personal message !!---

H: -- Okay, I get you and I also agree with you. However, being Gay plays a major role on one's life. We all lie or atleast have lied before and it is so easy to kneel and ask God to forgive you for your sins. But when you are gay and want to change, there are major steps to follow and it is hard. I definitely do not ignore my sins, I know I lie, I know I curse, and at times it is hard for me to control that but when I realize it is wrong and continuously ask God for forgiveness. When you are gay, you're whole life is just not the same. It is totally different. When you lie, it is just a lie. But being Gay is just..IDK. It grosses me out to think about it. I don't understand why people can't get over the fact that if you are a man you are meant to be with a woman and Vice Versa.

Me:   I hear you. ... I think about it like this. You're straight, I assume. Imagine if homosexuality was the natural order of things and how God intended it (just imagine). Now imagine heterosexuality was the sin. Think about how difficult it would be for you to hide your heterosexuality, to suppress your desire to be with another man (I think you're a girl, right? haha). Think about how lonely and alone you would feel if you couldn't cuddle with a guy, kiss a guy, express your love for a guy. That's what it would probably be like if you were gay. Sexuality is a HUGE part of life. You're a sexual being. I'm a sexual being. We all have urges. How difficult must it be to try to ignore or deny those urges for an entire lifetime?

You want gays to just accept the fact that men and women are the only proper couple. You want them to just suck it up and find an opposite sex partner to love and be with. But go back to the world I'm having you imagine. Would you be able to easily love and/or be intimate with another woman just because that's what's natural?

Everyone has their own urges and sexual desires. To force people into one way of living (even if that's what God intended) is a hard thing. Choosing to deny yourself and your interests is much more difficult than overcoming lying or a jealous spirit - asking God to forgive you.

I choose not to judge and just leave that part to the one that matters - God. Makes no sense for me to hate people and use all my energy tearing down others, because that's not going to attract people to God, AND it's not my duty. I'm supposed to love, embrace, lead by example, and understand.

H: WOW! That made a lot of sense....and again, I do agree and understand every word you're saying.

But a man who is "gay" has only "gay" thoughts and urges because of the devil. If they just simply repent, accept Jesus into there life then those homosexual thoughts and ways would not be present. It is not because they were born into the wrong body, they would be attracted to the opposite sex if only the devil exited there mind. It is all demons that give them those naughty thoughts.

If I wasn't a Christian, I probably would not care for men loving men and women loving women. It probably wouldn't matter to me at all. But the fact that I am a Christian and I know what is right and what is wrong, it is really hard for me to accept the fact that people are okay with deliberately going agaisnt God's word and doing it with no hesitation.

And I don't hate gays, I just don't agree with their way of life.

But thank you for that "speech"..lol. That was really good.

Me:  haha, no biggie. Didn't mean to go on and on. Yeah, it's a difficult subject, and I completely understand your point of view.

Here's the actual video which I was able to pull from a different internet site:

Be well,

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