But it's Dahhhhtmouth, dahling

It was never a question as to whether or not I'd go to college. College is a must. A definite.

Aside from aiming for Stuy, I didn't really have to aim for another school. It was apparent from Day 1 at Stuy that college follows rather naturally after graduation. The principal made it clear at the freshman assembly in the first week that aside from always using the overpass bridge so we don't break all our limbs crossing the West Side Highway (true story...he said that), our v e r y l i v e l i h o o d in the four years of high school is devoted to getting into a good college. Not college. A good college. No. A GREAT college. Everything matters.

So when it came time to pick a college, there were really only two colleges on my list and one of them seemed like a far fetched dream.

I visited Dartmouth one summer (junior summer, I'm guessing. I have a terrible memory and I'm no good with time) and fell in love with it. It was just an overnight trip that Dartmouth sent me some info and an app for. We had to apply with a transcript and everything for this trip. So I went and enjoyed myself a lot. A bunch of us from Stuy met some kids from other hoity toity ::cough::Exeter::cough:: schools and went out in search of the golf course to look at the stars. Shooting star season. I don't know where we ended up (never figured that out in the years I spent at Dartmouth) but it wasn't the golf course. We did stay up to watch for shooting stars. I saw a bunch but I really just marveled at the fact that I can see stars at ALL. It was awesome. I even figured out the Big Dipper and Orion all by myself. They look exactly like the pictures in books (except much more brilliant in real life). We stayed up pretty late and we all chose one class to attend the next day. I promptly fell asleep in class (and I was told the professor even put his hand on my shoulder as he lectured up and down the isles...didn't even register in my mind), something I'd do pretty often once I enrolled. We spoke to some students doing the summer there. Everyone was nice and welcoming. We hung out on the Green, which is surrounded by trees. It wasn't sweltering even though it was the middle of August.

I fell in love with Dartmouth.

It was a logical love. I fell in love with Dartmouth because it was everything NYC was not. I needed to know that if I am indeed a city girl, I know that I am one because I've tried other things and didn't like it. I needed a school that was far enough away from home so that I can have free reign to be who I wanted to be. It's an Ivy League school that uses the common app. I'm lazy and I'm sold!

I had thought about Yale, too. But it's YALE. I didn't stand a chance. Maybe I should have applied anyway but I was really set on Dartmouth at that point. Plus, they accepted my app to come on that summer visit. I figured my chances were decent. So, I applied early! The instant I received my acceptance in my email, I started crying. I WAS SO OVERJOYED!!! (I had to wait to get home to check. I didn't want an embarrassing situation in the school library in case I didn't get in.) My mom came home from work and I was still shaking from the excitement. I told her, and she asked when I was going to apply to other schools.

Wow. What a buzzkill. I can understand though. Of all the Ivies, I pick the one that no Asian parent knows. Hell, a LOT of people wouldn't be able to list Dartmouth among the Ancient Eight. It's that last thing on the list that bugs the hell out of people when they can't think of it.

But, I stuck with my choice. Mostly because I was legally bound to attend Dartmouth by then. I had the time of my life there. Lots of ups and plenty of downs. I can't say that I wouldn't have had a better time elsewhere but I definitely appreciated my time at Dartmouth and the people that I've met.

Has it gotten me anywhere yet? Not really. Although my current boss decided to give me an interview upon seeing my resume that included the Dartmouth name. WOOT!

(Real Ivy is Green. GO DARTMOUTH!)
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Janitors make how much?

How useful has my Ivy-League degree been to me? How cold is the sun? How shallow is the sea?

I'm a bit biased at this point.

Fact 1: Law schools are ranked according to certain criteria. Namely, the GPA and LSAT of their incoming students. Therefore, they care deeply about your GPA and not at all about where that GPA came from. I regularly hear about people who graduated from community college with a 4.0 made possible by 60 credits in interpretive dance and basket weaving. Those people blow me out of the water when in comes to applications because, for the purposes of law school apps, nobody cares where you went to school.

Fact 2: Once you actually land a job, nobody will ever care where you went to school again. Your prospects for advancement will be decided in equal parts by your work ethic, the caprice of your overlords, and good or bad luck that you have no influence over.

Fact 3: In an economic downturn, when you're looking for work, your Ivy degree is a scarlet letter. Nobody believes that you will really stay at an admin job once the economy picks up, because "you could do anything".

Fact 4: Most of the first 2 facts are bullshit in my particular scenario. I would never have gotten my first job if I didn't have that Ivy name on my resume. I put the school on, took my GPA off, and landed a kick-ass job largely on name recognition. In addition, law is probably the single-most prestige driven field in the world so the Ivy undergrad I have probably does give me some tangible advantage over a Borough of Manhattan Community College grad. So, while my degree didn't help me at the job, it put my foot in the door, and while it didn't help me get into law school, it'll help me get into a firm.
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What's in a Name?

It is ingrained in your head as a youth…you should go to a good school and be a doctor. If you get into an Ivy-League school like Harvard or Yale you are set for life. I soaked all of this in as a kid and let it guide my in my studies and point me in the right direction. When I got into Dartmouth, one of the lesser known Ivies (and one of the least pretentious in my opinion), I was told I would be set …that’d I’d be writing my paychecks. Fast forward about six years later and you find me working in a great law firm, making some decent money and contemplating about my future.

I wasn’t a stellar student by any means- I was pretty much average. My first few terms were rough which dragged my GPA through the mud and made me have to climb and claw my way back into a GPA over 3.0. I graduated above the average, did some sports for a bit, joined a dance group and a few clubs, studied in Rome, Italy, had a couple of jobs here and there that were good resume fodder, and got some nice reviews from professors. I had a few friends that went to a state school in Georgia who used to cheat off of me in high school on physics tests and math tests. One of them studied advanced physics throughout her time there and was receiving A’s all through her career. What the hell? I’m scraping and struggling for A’s in philosophy, English, and anthropology classes and someone that struggled with high school science is now a science major. What kind of crap is that? So the question is: which one would you hire? Obviously it depends on the position in this case…but consider this: say two women worked the same jobs, did the same number of sports, did wonderful volunteer opportunities and can fluently speak at least one other language. All of that is identical. One of the women, woman A, went to a State school and was at the top of her class- possible valedictorian/salutatorian. Then you’ve got woman B who went to an Ivy League school. Now this one’s around a B/B+ average. Who do you pick? If you went to an Ivy League…you’re probably going to pick the other Ivy Leaguer but…if not…what do you do?

My views on this are kind of weird as I’m not 100% sure how I feel on the subject. I don’t have this sense of entitlement (or an unrealistic one at least) that’s like I went to an Ivy…I’m better than you. One…if you look at the yearly post that U.S. News (or one of those papers makes) about the top 100 schools…the first ones are not always Ivies. Duke is regularly tied or above Dartmouth as is Stanford and others. Granted this list counts number of professors doing research etc so these so the numbers are a tad skewed in favor of larger institutions (Dartmouth is TINY!) but, the top 8 are not always the Ivies. Now, I don’t regret my choice as I love love love Dartmouth, but looking ahead to law school…I’m not sure I’ll make the same decision. Graduate schools are a bit different in that often, no matter where you go, as long as you place in the top few in your class, you’re good. I hear this is especially true for medical schools, not so sure on law schools yet. I will be making my choice based on curriculum, location, and opportunities this time around so hopefully I can find a happy balance and an experience similar to the fun I had at Dartmouth.

So who would I pick? The Dartmouth Grad (if there is one) because I know that person is ready for the job at hand and because we can talk about our experiences and share! In lieu of a Dartmouth grad…I’d have to go with the one I feel better about. Gut instinct would have to decide…. Read more...

President Obama sits down with Jay Leno

President Barack Obama sat down with Tonight Show host, Jay Leno, last night for a light-hearted interview that involved some tough questions.

The President discussed serious issues from the credit crisis all the way to the comedic dialogue on "scary Portuguese Waterhead dogs." Obama displayed his congenial side while offering clarity on the government's latest actions in his usual calm and reassuring manner. This was certainly an interview for the history books, as it marked the first time in American history that the acting President has sat as a guest on a chat/talk show.

The toughest question of the night came when Jay asked Pres. Obama about the recently passed tax on previously distributed corporate bonuses.

Did you watch the interview? Let us know your thoughts.

Click Here to watch the full interview

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Party beCause! Come out for a good cause!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

MORE THAN A PARTY...PARTY FOR A CAUSE
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

HOLD THE DATE.... THURSDAY, MARCH 26TH from 6P-8P

Ole’ Ole’

564 Washington Blvd

Jersey City, NJ 07310

Map Quest Directions

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

$20 gets you 2 drinks, some apps and that warm glow of Giving Back!

Proceeds to benefit the Boys & Girls Club of Hudson County.

For more information... www.bgcnj.or

RSVP to PartybeCAUSE@bgcnj.org

Or on FACEBOOK

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The Crying Game

Are you familiar with a zero sum game? It is a game where, for you to gain something, someone has to lose something. I'm currently in the running for a ridiculously prestigious internship that would literally set me up for life. If I get it, I have a job practically guaranteed at one of the top firms in the world upon graduation... I can honestly say that taking that opportunity away from someone else doesn't bother me in the slightest. I'm just antsy because I might not get it.

I love food. It is my one true indulgence. Price is no object and I embrace gluttony. These days I'm capable of finishing a large pizza with the works by myself. When I used to go to restaurants in NY, I could finish a 1lb burger before other people took two bites. This is a problem. I'm not as young as I used to be, I'm fatter than I used to be, and I don't lose weight as readily as I once did. I do love food, but I'm also very very vain so I had to find a way to make the two things works. So, at some point, I had to make a choice. Paradigm shift. Priority reassessment. So now I'm trying to live healthyish.

What does that mean? I love being a glutton, and don't have the heart to deny myself anything. Each Christmas for the past 10 years, I've given myself the gift of 20 Cinnabons and each Christmas those 20 Cinnabons are gone within four to five days. So, with the knowledge that I tend to eat vast quantities of food, I had to play to my strengths. One of those is that I usually don't really get hungry. Sure, some days I wake up with hunger pangs and have to eat breakfast, but most days I can hang out till mid afternoon with no desire to eat aside from the desire created by being aware that societal norms dictate that I should have eaten several meals already.

And thus came about my strategy for healthy living. I just eat one huge meal a day. Today for example, I'm preparing a delicious rack of ribs which I plan to demolish for dinner. While that will push me over the acceptable threshold for the day, that's fine since today is a gym day!

I just had a memory of a fun convention I went to at my undergrad.
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Let's Chat God...

Lord they really think they fooling you
By coming to church on Sunday,
Praying and laying hands on folks
Stomping and jumping around faking the holy ghost.

But its a thin line between walking it and talking it
Living it and giving it or just pretending it's alright.
And did they really think that they could pull the wool over your eyes Lord?
Did they really think that by faking they were saved that they would get the same reward?
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Yea…I’m goin’ there today. Religion time!!




The lyrics/video above are from a song I was listening to yesterday which sparked my interest in posting on religion. The guy is an amazing singer; there’s a lot of soul and pain in his voice but this song gets me every time. Makes me think…. I have been so disillusioned by "The Church” (I’m including all of them in one little nutshell lol) these days that I refuse to go. I like God…don’t get me wrong…whether or not he likes me is a different story, but I do try to be a good person and follow His word. I’m not well-versed on all of the religions out there nor am I attempting to be but I do like to learn and I love to meet people from different religions and cultures and pick their brains. I haven’t even finished the bible…don’t judge me!

I do know for sure that I am totally turned off (lol) by the institutions surrounding religion these days. Every day you hear about some priest/pastor soliciting prostitutes, stealing from the church, molesting children. What the HELL is up with that?! These are our religious leaders- supposedly pillars of the faith who have given themselves to God/Allah etc and they can’t keep their hands to themselves? Even if I happened to be into little kids (definitely definitely not!), I’m pretty sure the stigma of my position as a religious leader could at least keep that urge in check. Apparently not…. What’s worse is…when the church/institution finds out…these perverts get a slap on the wrist!! Transferred to some random part of the country/world for a few years until the problem “goes away”. And you want me to come in to your doors, give you massive donations weekly, confess my sins to you (I’m not Catholic…but just saying), and let you tell me how to live my life righteously…. HELL NO.

While we’re on the topic…let’s talk about these massive donations. Now, I don’t know about all of these institutions, but it is common in black comedy to hear the comedian ask about the “church building fund” . I.E. –

The pastor is a pimp! He comes in every week in a nice new suit, driving a hot car and asking us for donations for the building fund. What building fund!?! This church hasn’t had any building done since I’ve been here!

Usually they're really saying that the pastor is using the money for himself or for some unnecessary things for the church. Let’s chat here…I’m from Atlanta, right? Well…ever hear of Creflo Dollar (lol @ that name by the way!)? Well, he has one of the mega-churches down here in Georgia. Its HUGE! HOW BIG DOES YOUR CHURCH NEED TO BE?! Need I remind you…Jesus preached outside, thanks. In this case...there is actually some church building going on but its already to the point that people have to watch him speak via closed-circuit t.v.'s because they cant actually see him from where they are sitting. I might as well stay home then...what's the point?And...people give so much to this church that they cannot pay their own bills but the size of the church steadily grows and you rarely hear about these mega-churches giving back. Sometimes…but not often.

Just sit and think for a moment…how many religious scandals have you heard of thus far this year…2009? I’ve seen many in the headlines. I’m talking drugs, prostitutes, child molestation. Google this stuff. You will see. Now I’m not holding these people to some unrealistic ideal…they are human, despite whatever vows they made…but come on!! How can you hold your head up high when telling your followers not to sin when you are knee deep in your own??





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Where are the children?

Or...Where are the GRANDchildren?!?!

I had a Life Plan. I've had a Life Plan since I was 4. I was going to be a cop, a firefighter, and/or a doctor. I also thought that I would be out in the workforce by age 5. Hahahaha When you're 4, it's easy to overestimate your abilities.

I have deviated SO far from that Life Plan...even after I've made the necessary adjustments when taking REALITY into consideration.

The Life Plan
*Finish college- by age 21
*Go to grad school immediately afterwards- by age 22
*Sometime during the grad school years, I would get married- by age 24
*A year after I get married, I would have my first baby- by age 25
*Finish grad school
*Get a job that pays a gazillion dollars.

How am I doing so far?

*I finished college a year behind schedule. But at least it's done.
*I haven't applied to grad school. I haven't even looked into the PhD programs. I really need to get a handle on that.
*I'm close to being 24 but far from getting married.
*If I'm not close to being married, I'm even farther away from having a baby. Call me old-fashioned, but I would much rather do the baby thing AFTER the I Do.
*My 4-figure bank account is definitely not due to me spending my gazillions.

Babies...I'm an only child so I plan on a LOT of babies. At the very least, three. My mom has told me that I shouldn't worry about raising them on my own if I'm in grad school when I have them. She'll help me. So she wants me to shoot 'em out and hand them off to her for a few years. Tempting.

A few months ago, she mentioned that she hopes to be a grandmother this year. I think she should REALLY take that wish back before it comes true because there WILL be babydaddy drama if I get preggers now with not even a boyfriend in sight.

I'm constantly reminded by my mother that I'm not getting any younger. According to the CDC, the average age of mothers in NY State when they have their first child is 22.5. So, I'm behind schedule. But the average age of Chinese mothers when they have their first child is over 30 years old, and the average age overall is 27.2 So I still have some time according to people outside of NYS.

But my plan is still my plan despite whoever else is poppin 'em out. I've conceded to having my first child by the time I'm 30. I really hope I don't have to push that timeline back farther. So guys out there, I am for real so don't F around with me.

Anyone else find it funny that the first link on Google about the average age of first CHILD/PREGNANCY is from the CENTER OF DISEASE CONTROL AND PREVENTION?!?! Hahaha...Pregnancy. The disease.
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Resisting the American Dream

Real Dreams aren't free. They cost a lot; dreams cost a whole lot.
The fact of the matter is, most of us are too cheap to ever go after them.

We are always taught to value security, comfort, and systems. Essentially, the properly trained American has been conditioned to fear "complete freedom" and embrace the "predictable future" - college, job, family, old age, death. We live in a culture where as early as kindergarten, kids are ready and itching to be "grown." They want grown relationships, grown money, grown jobs, and, surprisingly, grown drama. Me, I always have and always will maintain my mantra: "I don't want to grow up, I'm a TOYS 'R US kid!"...maybe drop the second clause.

I've just always seen through the shallow sales pitch society offers. They told me to get a house, and I thought "why not travel or have 3?" They said get a license and buy a car, and I thought "I like walking. It gets me to where I want to go and keeps me healthy." They told me to get a job, and I thought "Why a have a 'job?' Why can't I just survive off of learning and expressing my gifts." To me, the American dream was simply depressing. I actually saw it as perhaps the best example of depression manifested. From my perspective, the "dream" they sell us is little more than confinement, unfulfilled potential, a distraction if you will, a dead end. It's a one-way street lined with regrets and poorly-traded desires. I want no part in it. Sure, maybe I'll end up there by happenstance but the route I seek allows me to explore life and the time I've been given in the most liberated way possible.

The Road Less-Traveled: You could say Americans promote this concept as well, but that's a lie. Promotion involves more than just lip service but actual follow-through and assistance. Our society provides us every opportunity and resource needed to achieve the "American Dream" - scholarships, commercial reminders, testimonials, loans, grants, organizations, government. Indeed the "American Dream IS promoted. Now compare that to the assistance provided those along the "Road Less-Traveled." ...Yep. Consequently, the high cost I mentioned earlier.

Real Dreams require personal investment, constant maintenance, and a good sense of direction because they will take you everywhere as they evolve.

You all know that I am actively chasing my music dream and have taken a few big first steps. Here's the reality: I have to shell out cash & large amounts of time, I'm really depleting my self-confidence reserves and can't seem to get any substantial "encouragement loans." It appears that the friend/family banks are uneasy about supporting unfamiliar ventures. But hey, my spirits are lifted every time I think about the path I'm on - the mystery, the excitement, the potential. When I think on these things, I am proud.

Actually, the more I think about the costs associated with the less-traveled road, the more I realize they pale in comparison to the price paid for the "dream" society promotes. After all, Money & Time are meant to be used up and spent wisely (the way we choose). Potential & Gifts/Talents on the other hand were meant to be reached and displayed, not discarded.

Again:
Money & Time are meant to be used up and spent wisely (however we choose). Potential & Gifts on the other hand were meant to be reached and displayed, not discarded.

Is it me or does society have this backwards?

Yes, I'm still the same questioning elementary school child with the warped life outlook... No, I won't trade it in. Read more...

*Highlights* - Coraline

GUY INCOG says:



Some movies just aren't meant to have mass appeal. Ultimately the effect of attempting to make Coraline all things to all people is that it's a bit dark for the kids and not dark enough for adults. No responsible parent would take a young child to see this movie since it would likely cause them to wake screaming in the night. Teenagers will find Coraline relatable at first but ultimately stunted as a character. Lastly, adults will find the movie a bit abrupt and saccharine. As a result, despite fantastic artwork and an intriguing storyline, it ends up not having the staying power of dark classics like The Nightmare Before Christmas.
This movie gets...

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*Highlights* - Great 5-Min Movies

MUSECATTO says:

Yesterday I discovered this YouTube Channel with tons of phenomenal short films. Here are three of my favorites, but I will be highlighting several others in the coming weeks. This week's short films all showcase "Humanity" whether that be our weaknesses, fears, desires, or courage. Enjoy and stop by next week for 3 more of my favorite picks. And comment! Let me know your thoughts!

This one has a surprising/gut-wrenching ending:



Great acting and really touching:



Funny and thought-provoking:


All of these vids get 5 caps from me! They're cum laude material...great.  
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*Highlights* - He's on the PHONE! Swim for your LIVES!!!

SOUTHERN SUBSTANCE says:

Cell Phones: The New Contraceptive

I'm hesitant to laugh at this but I just picture a tiny little sperm swimming around and being zapped by some ray of doom from the cell phone and I burst out laughing. Poor sperm...they always get the worst of it!

If the man is stressed, there's fewer of them to rally if needed. Overweight or sick...same thing. Not to mention that a large portion of them are....wasted whenever the man is feeling...frisky. And...if they do manage to live through all of this...only one gets the coveted prize. The rest just die off... Thank god we made it guys! Grats on first place!

Granted they are saying that there are more factors than just cell phone use...but with all the talk about cell phone use being linked to different types of cancer, functioning of the brain in total, and car wrecks and serious injuries due to using cell phones...I think they're getting a mighty bad rap here...

The educational value and lowered risk of pregnancy (lol)!!!!!!!!! gets:

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*Highlights* - Cop a feel?!

GOTHAM DAYS says:

HMMM!?!?!?



I don't know what's going on here...


Just a few questions though.

1. How is it possible the guy being...frisked...didn't flinch?! He stayed hella calm...
2. Was any action taken against the officer for repeatedly squeezing the man's penis?! Looked like he squeezed kinda hard, too
3. Who was taping that? Definitely didn't look like a police cam...

This piece of confusion gets:


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*Highlights*- The Law School Flow Chart

GUY INCOG says:

Click to enlarge:

How true is this flow chart?  5-out of-5.

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