Cardiac Arrest

I originally wanted to write about what happened two days ago. I don't know where to begin. I can't really dive right into the story without a beginning. I don't know what to say because I don't know what to think.

So instead of storytime, I'm going to ask some questions that I have.

1. Have you ever cared for someone too much for your own good?
2. Have you ever cried over something someone else thought was trivial?
3. Have you ever attached yourself to someone only to wonder what it is that keeps you chained to them?
4. Have you had hope only to realize you don't know what you're hoping for?
5. If there is emotional infidelity, are there relationships based solely on emotions and nothing more?
6. Have you ever felt like everything you knew could very well be a lie?
7. How does someone choose between living in utopia based on omission of reality and living in reality with a clear perception of the non-existence of utopia?
8. How can I keep going not knowing what is real or what to believe?
9. How can I know everything isn't just a delusion?

These aren't existentialist inquiries or questions of faith. These are doubts of the heart.