Bee Afraid!

Imagine...you are strolling along listening to your Ipod (Zune if you're a rebel!!!) when all of a sudden you see a 6'1 black woman running at you and screaming for her life...the look of fear in her eyes very real...and very scary....What would you do?

This was the scene Saturday, many different times, as wasps and yellow jackets chased me all over Six Flags Over Georgia.

I don't know why I'm so afraid of bees (and spiders...)... I have only been stung once in my life...and I didn't even know I was stung initially. Someone had to tell me a bee was stuck to my shirt and when I went to the Nurse...she couldn't find a stinger but there was a raised red area. Every since then though... I will run like a machete wielding crazy is chasing me down the street. I have even...and I'm ashamed to admit this...run out into oncoming traffic.

THEY FOLLOW ME TOO!! What the hell!!! Like...I'll walk a few feet away...and the bee will follow. Heartbeat begins to increase and my face gets hot....A few more steps a different way...still following me. Eyes widen...breathing speeds up...I take many more steps a different way...and the bee attempts to land on me. That's when I freak! I have nightmares about bees...where I'm being covered by them and they just wont stop stinging me. I wake up in cold sweats...My fear has changed my life in many ways. I tend to stay in the house during the spring and summer months. I will never have a garden (though I desperately want one...) nor will I have fruit trees or plants in my yard. I cannot wear floral perfumes and try to avoid bright flowery colors in my wardrobe.

I need therapy.... I really do. My fear of bees and spiders has really begun to affect me. For instance...one night...I saw this huge spider crawling up my wall. I knocked it down...and it just ran back up faster. I jumped up...turned the light on and there it was staring at me. I took off running across the hall and beat on my brothers' door...scaring the shit out of him. He thought a burglar was in the house! He comes barreling out of his room with a baseball bat in hand. Imagine how pissed he was when he found out that I was freaking out about a spider... and how even MORE pissed he was when we both realized the spider was simply a figment of my imagination. I had dreamt that scenario...but it felt so real that I actually woke up and really woke my brother up... I think I'm crazy.

And Saturday...at Six Flags? Please...I can't even tell you how many nervous breakdowns I almost had. The worst (and most embarrassing one) happened in a very cramped line where there were at least 150 people near me. I was already freaking out because there was a tiny wasps nest being built above my head and there were two or three wasps flying back and forth. They were staying up pretty high though...but I would not take my eyes off of them. All of a sudden...out of the corner of my eye...I see a large flying object heading towards me and then feel it land on my hand. My purse...water bottle...phone all go flying and I let out this horrible scream. Everyone looks at me and when I look down...its not a bee...its a huge (and pretty) dragon fly!!!! Some guy bends down and gives me the dirtiest look and says "You killed it!!!!!" and I hear some "awwws.." and people smacking their teeth at me. Some little girl says "why did she hurt it mommy? (tragic and cliche...I know...but wow...that shit really does happen!). I feel HORRIBLE! Luckily the dragonfly flipped itself over and flew away. That's when I knew I needed therapy...

I mean...I don't want to be totally oblivious (i.e. walking through tarantula pits naked or standing next to bee hives covered in honey) but I'd like to be able to lead a normal life...where I'm not constantly looking over my shoulder or scanning every bush/plant/tree for a damn bee or spider web...Help!