But I Poop From There!

Ever since coming to this country, I've been engrossed in a culture where the motto might as well be younger, nuder and raunchier. Each news story breaks with younger and younger demographics pushing the envelope of sexuality. Children were having sex earlier and earlier and with greater and greater abandon. Nothing offended their sensibilities anymore.

This infuriated me because, as a teenager, I could never find these legendary nubile underaged whores. At my high school, all of the girls were mannish and spent their time after school splicing DNA rather than sucking off dudes behind the gym. To this day, I'm overwhelmed with bitterness and confusion at the hot cheerleader stereotype. Our cheerleaders didn't shave where they should, did shave where they shouldn't have to, and outweighed some of the smaller members of our football team.

These days, I don't really watch enough television to have a real opinion on sex and the media. The sitcoms that I do watch tend to reinforce the stereotypes that single people get laid every day and married people have sex once every three months. While I'm not entirely convinced of the veracity of that claim, my prenup will have a clause providing me the right to keep a coitus stunt double on retainer just in case.

P.S. It's Jessica Biel. Yea. I know. Me too.


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Confused and...Aroused?

We are two-faced…



First of all...I'd like to apologize for the lateness of my post. LONG ASS DAY AT WORK!!!!

Anyway...


When it comes to our society and sex…we’re hypocrites…tightasses…whatever you want to call it. We claim to be progressive, forward thinking, ever changing and evolving…but we don’t want any of the ramifications (if that’s what you want to call them) that come along with that. We’re APPALLED that we have such a high rate of teen pregnancy and that STD’s are running rampant…but then you turn on the t.v. and there’s nothing but boobs and innuendo. Even the news…every other story is some sex story- and you get the juicy deets too… they will read excerpts from court documents etc (or you can read them online!). Hell…sexual undertones have been in our cartoons for years (PePe LePew anyone? Damn rapist skunk!). I hear middle school kids telling about how so and so had sex with so and so… MIDDLE SCHOOLERS! We are a very sexual society after all….

On top of being horny bastards…we are also very news-hungry! The media likes to destroy our little perfect white picket fence facades with their daily stories of cheating spouses, rapists and molesters, and deviants. As much as we like our own personal privacy… we are CONSUMED by news of who is sleeping/cheating with who and how kinky our favorite celebrities, politicians, and religious figures are (admit it…you are!). Face it…reading these gossip magazines makes you feel so much better about yourself...LeAnn Rimes is cheating on her husband with a co-worker! Ha! Rich people do it too!
Rhianna is a freak in the bedroom! Woo!!! I feel better about my own kinks!!!



I mean...we eat up nude pics and sex tapes(Lookin’ at you Cassie…[above...]) so much so that they’re not even scandals anymore! Look at poor old Edisen Chen (below...). He took some “scandalous” pics with female celebrities, etc and he’s being banned/forced to quit acting... Um…doesn’t that happen at least once a week here? Nude pics always surface right before a new concert/movie/c.d. and NOTHING happens. Had he been an established actor here in the good ol’ U.S….his stock would go up! He’d get a reality show…and probably a few more movies….



On one hand the media is telling us that being promiscuous is bad (mainly for women…men can dabble here and there- Hi atheletes!) but then they’re like LOOK. SEX SCANDAL OF SO AND SO. And we’re drawn back in… Sitting here trying to define our society’s views on sex… I cant…

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America's Sexual Shame Blame Game

The media and the rise of a "liberated" American sex culture are definitely related. Anyone who has been alive for more than 15 years has surely noticed the declining censorship of web, television, and music content. With that, Americans of all ages have grown accustomed to having sexual material accessible with just the click of the mouse, press of a button, or changing of the station.



I don't necessarily "blame" the media for promulgating a social ill, because sex in and of itself is not bad. Moreover, the media is only the conduit through which ideas travel. Clearly, if we are upset that the entertainment content in our nation has become more explicit, we must realize that content begins with the people and succeeds or fails based on public reception. Our nation apparently gravitated towards and continues to enjoy sexually explicit material; the media is only reflecting the interests of the masses in embracing and sharing our emerging sex culture.

This issue is perhaps most interesting because although we are becoming more liberal and open in our views on sex, our society still seems sexually repressed and almost perverted in comparison to many European nations.

Whereas in Europe sex is seen as a beautiful and natural act of life, America's sexual liberalization seems geared towards spreading a careless, hedonistic, health-unconscious, and selfish attitude on sex. Sensuality, the emotional connection, and ramifications of "free love" are largely ignored by media outlets, and our once repressed culture is jumping to the dangerous opposite extreme of being harmfully exhibitionistic.

We've all had conversations with friends about how today's 5 year olds are talking about sex and cursing instead of watching Saturday morning cartoons. We've seen the Dateline specials on Online Sexual Predators and Pedophiles. We've read the reports of school teachers statutorily raping students. You probably also know individuals wasting hours of their life away on Internet porn sites like Xtube.

America's sexual identity is changing. The media bares some "responsibility" because it is enabling and broadcasting the evolution. Nevertheless, society changes ONLY because the people's thoughts and values change. Thus, any attempt to reroute the American sexual revolution would have to start with altering the very way people view/want to view sex. The media does not hold the brunt of the blame, we do. When we want to change, we eventually will.

Be well,

*The video above is a recent news story on Desmond Hatchett, a 29 year old father of 21 children
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Let's Talk About Sex, Baby

Now, who doesn't remember the 1992 Salt N' Pepa song "Let's Talk About Sex". They claimed sex was everywhere and everyone was having it.



I don't know if it was EVERYWHERE and EVERYONE was having it. But then again, I was 7 when the song became a hit single. However, it does seem that the media was very worried about the way sex had become so rampant among young people. I recall so many episodes from different family shows dedicated to making sure the teens in the house weren't pressured into sex and that they saw the importance of waiting. I believed all of that. Sex! Bad! I barely knew what the hell sex was at the time...

Ah..alas we still see sex at every turn. No, people aren't sexing in broad daylight in the park (what happens in the shadows is another story). But it does seem weird that the same channels pushing all the glamor of sex are the same ones doing tv specials warning us young folks about the dangers of sex. It makes about as much sense as the Phillip Morris commercials about its humanitarian efforts but meanwhile, they're hawking cigarettes at every news stand and deli.

Ah well. Of course people are going to feel more comfortable about having sex when it's made to seem like it's nothing. Sex and the City was all about free, fabulous, and funky sex. So, it's not just young people having sex. Old people have it, too.

Speaking of old people sex, it seems as though David Carradine died in a botched session of auto-erotic asphyxiation (choking oneself to get some sort of high during climax). I guess it's not just a stupid teen thing.

The music. OHHH the music. Let's bring it back to the music. Plenty o' sex in that genre. Booty. Boobs. Dick.

It is a bit over the top. Over-sexualizing kids. On the other hand, it's not the entertainment business' responsibility to educate the public about our choices. I believe that the prevalence of STIs and the rate of teen pregnancies is unnecessarily high and the fault falls on inadequate distribution of information in schools and in the home. I abstained from sex in high school because my family made it clear to me that getting pregnant as an unwed teenager would bring unspeakable shame to the family and also because my 8th grade and 11th grade health teachers showed the class some HEINOUS pictures of STIs. EW to the MAX. UGH Google them yourself.

But luckily some artists bear some of the responsibilities. The song is called S.E.X. but it's not just about that. Enjoy the vid! Lyfe Jennings really is something else.

Lyfe Jennings - S.E.X.
by keyzz

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Bee Afraid!

Imagine...you are strolling along listening to your Ipod (Zune if you're a rebel!!!) when all of a sudden you see a 6'1 black woman running at you and screaming for her life...the look of fear in her eyes very real...and very scary....What would you do?

This was the scene Saturday, many different times, as wasps and yellow jackets chased me all over Six Flags Over Georgia.

I don't know why I'm so afraid of bees (and spiders...)... I have only been stung once in my life...and I didn't even know I was stung initially. Someone had to tell me a bee was stuck to my shirt and when I went to the Nurse...she couldn't find a stinger but there was a raised red area. Every since then though... I will run like a machete wielding crazy is chasing me down the street. I have even...and I'm ashamed to admit this...run out into oncoming traffic.

THEY FOLLOW ME TOO!! What the hell!!! Like...I'll walk a few feet away...and the bee will follow. Heartbeat begins to increase and my face gets hot....A few more steps a different way...still following me. Eyes widen...breathing speeds up...I take many more steps a different way...and the bee attempts to land on me. That's when I freak! I have nightmares about bees...where I'm being covered by them and they just wont stop stinging me. I wake up in cold sweats...My fear has changed my life in many ways. I tend to stay in the house during the spring and summer months. I will never have a garden (though I desperately want one...) nor will I have fruit trees or plants in my yard. I cannot wear floral perfumes and try to avoid bright flowery colors in my wardrobe.

I need therapy.... I really do. My fear of bees and spiders has really begun to affect me. For instance...one night...I saw this huge spider crawling up my wall. I knocked it down...and it just ran back up faster. I jumped up...turned the light on and there it was staring at me. I took off running across the hall and beat on my brothers' door...scaring the shit out of him. He thought a burglar was in the house! He comes barreling out of his room with a baseball bat in hand. Imagine how pissed he was when he found out that I was freaking out about a spider... and how even MORE pissed he was when we both realized the spider was simply a figment of my imagination. I had dreamt that scenario...but it felt so real that I actually woke up and really woke my brother up... I think I'm crazy.

And Saturday...at Six Flags? Please...I can't even tell you how many nervous breakdowns I almost had. The worst (and most embarrassing one) happened in a very cramped line where there were at least 150 people near me. I was already freaking out because there was a tiny wasps nest being built above my head and there were two or three wasps flying back and forth. They were staying up pretty high though...but I would not take my eyes off of them. All of a sudden...out of the corner of my eye...I see a large flying object heading towards me and then feel it land on my hand. My purse...water bottle...phone all go flying and I let out this horrible scream. Everyone looks at me and when I look down...its not a bee...its a huge (and pretty) dragon fly!!!! Some guy bends down and gives me the dirtiest look and says "You killed it!!!!!" and I hear some "awwws.." and people smacking their teeth at me. Some little girl says "why did she hurt it mommy? (tragic and cliche...I know...but wow...that shit really does happen!). I feel HORRIBLE! Luckily the dragonfly flipped itself over and flew away. That's when I knew I needed therapy...

I mean...I don't want to be totally oblivious (i.e. walking through tarantula pits naked or standing next to bee hives covered in honey) but I'd like to be able to lead a normal life...where I'm not constantly looking over my shoulder or scanning every bush/plant/tree for a damn bee or spider web...Help!






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A Final Today

Not much to say right now. I'm in the middle of studying for a class final so just a quickie before I hit the books again.

I have a class final for a life insurance agent license later tonight. Wish me luck! =)

Oh don't give me that look. I have a soul. I am not a death dealer.

I just want to make sure your loved ones don't have to worry about certain expenses if and when you pass on. It's not a bad thing. Can't be if so many people are looking into buying insurance anyway. Why would you insure your car but not your life?

And I need a pay check. Working on commission should be a good motivator.

Ciao, babes! =)

UPDATE: PASSED!
Up Next: State Exam...EEP!

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Bruno *Violates* Eminem at the MTV Movie Awards

Thanks to Ms. Donna for sending in this lovely picture!

You may have missed the 2009 MTV Movie Awards! 

If so, BE GLAD - completely bereft of any entertainment quality.

There have been two highlights so far. 1) Bruno (who exactly is Bruno?!) falls onto rapper Eminem from the sky and conveniently lands in a 69 position with his bare ass in Eminem's face. Eminem, seemingly angered and jostled by the butt, was overheard on the microphone cursing and demanding Bruno get off of him. After Eminem's bodyguards pulled/assaulted the dangling Bruno, Eminem stood up and walked out of the MTV Movie Awards. Set up or no? What do you think?



2) Kristen Stewart, who shockingly won the award for best female actress *beating out oscar and golden globe nominees*, clumsily drops the coveted award on the floor.  Clip now Available:

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*Highlights* - There's a perfectly good explanation for this

I'm an unrepentant pervert.

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*Highlights* - Kobe & Lebron Puppet Commercials pt. 2

In case you haven't stayed up to date with the newest installments of the Lebron & Kobe Nike puppet commercials, here they are - all together! It's unfortunate that we won't be getting our dream final of Black Mamba Kobe vs. King James. Hopefully Superman will keep the NBA finals interesting and competitive.

Here are the commercials - catch up:












These TV ads have been some of the most effective I've seen in years. Not only did they revive the idea of intense NBA rivalries (something that has been lacking since the Reggie Miller, Patrick Ewing, Alonzo Mourning, Michael Jordan days), but Nike is probably going to get a nice boost in sales or at least market relevance.

Without question, this ad campaign gets high honors - CUM LAUDE:
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*Highlights* - Birthday Sex Video

AGH!!!! This song has been out for a hot minute...I'm sure it's blowing up the airwaves (I haven't listened to the radio in forever)...HELLA remixes out...Jeremiah's BEEN performing it...MAD people on Youtube covering, workin, twerkin, grindin to this song

and just NOW (few days ago) an official video is out.
(I hear this is actually the 4th vid out. Someone verify?)

I WAS SO EXCITED!!! After seeing it, my reaction...




This video is BUTT.

Can he take off his shirt at least?!
Can he TRY to look like he's about to give it to her?
She had more chemistry with the fruit than with him

I mean I wasn't looking for a Spectacular video but this video really lacked sex appeal...ESPECIALLY since SEX is in the title of the song

Lyrically, it's lacking. There's a line in there that has WAY too many syllables. Irksome.

The video should have been the original song's saving grace, except there are too many face shots. Dude looks like Diddy. They need to zoom away and he needs to take off his shirt.

So disappointed.

At least the beat is heat. I'll stick to the remixes.

The mental pleasure I got from this vid:

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*Hightlight* - Trimming the Bush to Make the Tree Look Taller

That is all...

5/5 Educational Value!


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